


hamartia

by Verisimilitude_Angel



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Angels, Angst, Attempt at Humor, Autassassinaphilia, Blood Kink, Blood and Gore, Blood and Torture, Blood and Violence, Brutal Murder, Canonical Character Death, Canonical Child Abuse, Character Death, Child Abuse, Death, Demons, F/F, F/M, Faked Suicide, For Now It's Just Flirting, Grim Reapers, Gunplay, I swear this isn't as bad as it sounds, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Insane MC, It's Just Very Dark, Knifeplay, M/M, Married Hisoka/Illumi Zoldyck, Meteor City | Ryuuseigai (Hunter X Hunter), Mild Sexual Content, Minor Hisoka/Illumi Zoldyck, Multi, Not Main Fic, Pansexual MC, Paraphilias, Past Child Abuse, Reincarnation, Sexual Assault, Sexual Tension, Slow To Update, Suicide, Tsundere Killua Zoldyck, Undecided Relationship(s)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-12
Updated: 2021-02-11
Packaged: 2021-03-16 09:34:08
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 19,584
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28704489
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Verisimilitude_Angel/pseuds/Verisimilitude_Angel
Summary: After an injury to the head causes you to regain memories of your past life, you come to realize that you were reborn into the world of hunterxhunter. Magic, treasures, and hidden enclaves are now all for the taking, and you will stop at nothing for it all, even at the cost of becoming another villain in the main character's story.
Relationships: Feitan (Hunter X Hunter)/Reader, Gon Freecs & Reader, Hisoka (Hunter x Hunter)/Reader, Illumi Zoldyck/Reader, Killua Zoldyck & Reader, Kurapika (Hunter X Hunter)/Reader, Kuroro Lucifer | Chrollo Lucifer/Reader, Leorio Paladiknight/Reader, Machi (Hunter X Hunter)/Reader, Pakunoda (Hunter X Hunter)/Reader
Comments: 18
Kudos: 64





	1. disclaimer

Hello, my name is Angel!

This disclaimer is just a brief summary of things you can expect of this story, I suggest reading it before moving on to the first chapter.

Firstly, I want to make it clear that this fanfiction is NOT my main focus. My main focus is my black butler fanfiction, so updates for this story will not be consistent. Also, I don't have a particular plot for this story, for the time being it's just the reader going through the motions.

Even though this story is not my main focus, I will still be putting my all into it. I'm very serious when it comes to writing, a perfectionist if you will. Even though this story is just the reader 'going through the motions' you can still expect the following things to be present: violence, gore, drugs, sexual assault, abuse, etc. Another main thing will be the representation of paraphilia's. I myself have paraphilia's so please understand that I am not trying to shame anyone, but simply write about things that I experience. For those who don't know: paraphilia's are atypical sexual practices. A prime example would be Hisoka's attraction to fighting strong opponents and the risk of death that comes with it. Paraphilia's are a sexual thing, so you might get uncomfortable reading this story as it will contain sexual content.

Rest assured, this story isn't just dark, I wrote it with the intention of it being mostly humorous. Mostly.

Lastly, I will be going by the hunterxhunter manga. I'm too lazy to rewatch 2011 episodes, especially 1999 episodes. The 2011 anime is basically the same as the manga, with a few differences here and there, so you shouldn't be immensely confused.

Overall, that's all you need to know. Obviously the hunterxhunter characters and plot do not belong to me, but outside of that, everything is my idea. If you see this story outside of quotev or ao3, please do report it to me.

Thank you for reading this disclaimer! You are now ready to begin **_hamartia_** , a hunterxhunter fanfiction.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> reader gets bonked

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> not me getting squeamish at my own writing
> 
> italics = thoughts
> 
> bold italics = memories
> 
> (parenthesis) = angel
> 
> [brackets] = demon

A slap to the face.

"YOU DISGUSTING CHILD!"

A fistful of your hair.

"LISTEN TO ME!"

Head being pulled back, you were met with the angered sight of your mother. Her eyes glared down at you, wide and frenzied. The eyes of a woman gone mad. Was that your fault? Perhaps.

"You did it on purpose didn't you?" She hissed.

You smiled.

"YOU'RE DISGUSTING!" She screamed. Tightening her hold on your hair, she began to drag you through the kitchen and into the hall. "YOU IMPURE CHILD! I'M GOING TO CLEAN YOU TILL YOU BLEED!"

Already knowing where this would lead, you allowed the woman to drag you away. She pulled you through the hair, making sure to purposely hit you against any and all furniture. However, you didn't once offer a single complaint, simply letting occur, simply keeping that smile on your face. With your lack of struggle it took only a minute before you found yourself outside.

Your island was a small one with only a handful of people. Every house on the island was spread about, giving privacy, giving your mother the opportunity to hurt you with no interruptions. She always took advantage of the fact that no one would hear your screams or cries to drag you outside where she would then proceed to make use of the bucket only a few feet away, filled with water.

It was always filled with water.

Every morning, right after your mother awoke, the first thing she would do is fill the bucket. It didn't matter that the only well in the island was a mile away, without fail she would always fill it up. Be it in the scorching summer or freezing winter, no matter what, the bucket would be filled. She was faithful to this ritual as priests were to praying.

"You filthy brat!" She yelled. "You're impure! Impure! I need to wash you! I need to wash all of you away!"

Forcing you down on your knees, she reached into the bucket of water and pulled out a soaking sponge. It was a simple sponge, a regular sponge, it held both a soft and rough side. You came to find as your mother used it on you daily, that neither mattered, they were both equally as irritating on your skin.

Pulling up the back of your shirt, she dunked the sponge into water one last time before furiously using it to scrub your back. You never though tit possible, but years of the same spot being scrubbed on had worn out not just the sponge but your back as well. Your skin had started to irritate and peel, creating a large, pink, and tender spot on your back.

You can't recall the first time your mother had 'washed away' your 'impurities.' You can't remember the beginning to any of your abuse. Beatings, drownings, burns, and suffocation was all you had ever known and probably will ever know. According to the villagers, the night she had given birth she had crawled off her bed, bloody and sobbing, to dunk you into water. They had managed to save you that time, but as days bled into years and the abuse turned into a norm, it had become much harder for them to do so.

Of course, it had also become harder on you.

As days bled into years and the abuse turned into a norm, you found your tears drying quicker than before and the frown on your lips slowly but surely moving upwards. You found, that as the days bled into years and your mother's abuse became a norm, that it was starting to become harder for you not to enjoy the pain inflicted.

What else there to do?

You could cry and whine all you want but it was clear that you mother would never let up on her abuse. You could cry and whine all you want or. . .or you could simply relish in the pain she inflicted. You could simply make joy where there was none to be found.

And that's exactly what you did.

One fateful day when your hands had accidently brushed your mother's own, you were taken to the kitchen stove where she then proceed to burn away at them. It was a rule of hers, along with many others, to never touch her, not even accidently. To pay for having broken that rule she inflicted harsh burns on your hands, burns that still existed to this day. Many would prefer to hide them, ashamed by the scars, but you gladly paraded them around the village, for the day you were burned was the day you had turned pain into pleasure.

Your mother was never not inflicting pain upon you. She'd yell at you for talking, slap you for making eye contact, kick you for making a mistake, strangle you when you slept, and drown you when you awoke. However, she had never once burned you until that fateful day, when your hands had accidently touched her own. The moment the flames were set alit before you, you found the greatest fear taking hold of your heart. This could cause permanent damage, you realized, this could ruin your hands. For once, you had actually begged your mother not to hurt you, to forgive you. Of course, she hadn't, so you were forced to deal with the consequences of your own actions. You were forced to bring your hands atop the stove and place them right atop the flames. It was frightening, it was painful, and it was the worst thing that had happened to you yet. Having no choice but to put up with it you figured you might as well enjoy yourself. You might as well relish in the pain.

Flames biting at your skin, the scent of burning flesh wafting through the air, and your mother's taunts slipping into your ears, that was the day you began to enjoy your mother's abuse.

You knew it was not normal.

You knew it was not right.

Pain should not bring pleasure, it should not bring forth a smile on your face. When a mother abuses a child, the child should cry and shake in fear. But you on the other hand only laugh with ecstasy and shake in excitement, as if she had brought forth a gift and not her fists.

You know it's not normal.

You know it's not right.

But what else is there to do but enjoy it?

The sponge had long been worn out from constant use along with your back and pain. Now, you couldn't help but feel as if the sponge scrubbing harshly at your skin, peeling and irritating it, was like an itch being scratched. It brought relief, pleasure, and you wanted more.

"Stop moving!"

You ignored your mother, not feeling satisfied with the way she was ignoring the rest of your backside.

"You piece of-!" Taking a fistful of your hair, she threw your head down and onto the bucket. "DON'T MOVE!"

No doubt had she been aiming to dunk you underwater, but in her fit of frustration she had missed and slammed your head along it's side instead. It wasn't the first time this had occurred, the rim of the wooden bucket was now permanently stained with blood as your head was with scars. But it was the first time you had recalled a memory you did not live.

* * *

_**What is life after death?** _

_**That's a question that has been asked for generations, for centuries, however it has never been answered. To know what comes after death one must die first, and when one dies one cannot come back to life to let the rest of the world know of his findings.** _

_**I myself have questioned the afterlife, I myself have created an answer. I wouldn't call it my own, it has definitely been influenced by religious teachings, but it is still an answer nonetheless.** _

_**A greater being or an endless black void, that is the answer which I have come up with. When I die, I will either be met by a greater being, whether it be one that was discussed in the bible is not of my concern, or an empty abyss, a place for me to simply be nothing after having done everything.** _

_**"Hello!"** _

_**It was the former that ended up being correct.** _

_**"Welcome to purgatory!"** _

_**I just didn't expect the greater being to look like an exhaustion office worker.** _

_**Dressed in a suit and adorning the most forced smile I had ever seen was a woman, standing just a few feet away before me. She stared at me and I could've sworn she was doing so with the intent to look into my soul.**_

_**"Where am I?" I asked.** _

_**"This is purgatory!" She raised her hands in a way that was clearly meant to elicit excitement, but failed. "Welcome!"**_

_**Purgatory?** _

_**Looking around, I found 'purgatory' to be rather plain. We were standing in a lobby, chairs resting on the walls with a reception desk just a few feet away. The logo on the reception desk read just as she had stated the place to be: purgatory. Overall, it was plain, but it was also lonely. I found that the only people inside the lobby were me and the woman, something that would have unsettled me had I any fucks to give. I had already died, what could she possibly do to me? I just wanted to get this afterlife process over and done with, make my way to heaven or hell, if such places even existed.** _

_**"Why am I here?" I asked her.** _

_**"You have died!"** _

_**"I know." I did it myself after all. "What I want to know is: what now?"** _

_**"Now we see what you qualify for!" She beamed.** _

_**"What?"** _

_**Choosing to ignore my question, the woman turned sharply on her heel, startling me. She made her way over to the reception area, moving to stand behind the desk.** _

_**"What's your name?" She asked.** _

_**"Y/n L/n."** _

_**Opening a drawer underneath the desk, she began to look through a set of files. There seemed to be hundreds of them, each labeled by different names, names I could only assume belonged to the people who would be dying today. Proving my theory correct, the woman pulled out a file with my name on it.** _

_**"Y/n L/n, born [birth date], correct?" She asked.** _

_**I nodded.** _

_**"You died on the tenth of January, the year 2021, at the age of sixteen," She noted. "You were. . .oh! You were murdered! How lucky!"** _

_**"What's so lucky about being murdered?" I glared at her.** _

_**She didn't answer, simply prompting to send me a smile.** _

_**Closing the file and tucking it underneath her arm she motioned for me to follow her. I did so, curious to see where she would take me. Would it be heaven, or would it be hell? Or would it be somewhere completely different? By the way she led me through a series of halls, each just as plain as the lobby, I could only assume it was the latter.** _

_**I was proven correct when I found myself sitting in a conference room.** _

_**"I will now be presenting to you everything after death," the woman stated. She moved about the room, setting up a projector. I watched her silently, internally noting how this all seemed like something straight out of the Good Place. I couldn't help but wonder if she was an angel as well. "Alrighty!" She clapped her hands, snapping me into attention. "Let's begin!"** _

_**I straightened up, crossing my legs and setting my hands down on the table before me. My attention was now focused solely on the woman.** _

_**"Thank you for dying today!" She beamed. "I'm reaper #3289212 of realm #1289302 and will now be presenting to everything after death!"** _

_**Before she could continue, I interrupted.** _

_**"You're a grim reaper?"** _

_**"Yes ma'am," she nodded. "Or in other human words, I am death."** _

_**I narrowed my eyes on the woman, scrutinizing her. It was hard to believe that she was death itself, but I suppose I had no other choice but to take her words at face value. Seeing as she stated a serial number, chances were there was more than one reaper, more than one entity of death.** _

_**I couldn't help but wonder if they all acted like brainwashed retail workers.** _

_**"Proceed."** _

_**Motioning towards the presentation, she spoke without casting it a glance, no doubt having memorized the words by now.** _

_**"First off, where are you? As stated earlier, you are in purgatory. Purgatory is a waiting room for the afterlife," she revealed. "Once a human perishes, we reapers collect the information of your life and death from the angel and demon assigned to you at birth."** _

_**"Angel and demon?" I rose a brow.** _

_**"Their purpose is to mark down every good and bad deed committed by you since birth," she revealed. "Contrary to the beliefs of your realm, they actually have no influence over said actions, they're simply the score keepers of them."** _

_**"I see. . ." I trailed off. "So where are they now?** _

_**"They have served their purpose so they no longer exist."** _

_**"They're dead?" I blinked, surprised.** _

_**"Dead implies that they lived in the first place." She tilted her head curiously, smile never wavering and eyes never blinking. "Existing and living are two different things and your angel and demon simply existed. Because they have finished serving their purpose they no longer exist."** _

_**Her words made me feel slightly bad knowing I had killed off two holy beings, but I suppose they always knew they were meant to meet such a demise.** _

_**"Is that their only purpose?" I asked. "Keeping score that is."** _

_**"Yes," She nodded. "If God and Satan were to ever need an angel or demon to do something for them, they'd create them for that sole purpose. However, once that purpose is completed they will cease to exist. At the moment, the only thing they need is for a human's deeds to be marked."** _

_**"I see," I muttered.** _

_**"Moving on," she started, "The information we collect from the assigned angels and demons allow us to determine your afterlife."** _

_**"How so?"** _

_**"A human death is classified into four categories: natural, accidental, homicide or suicide," she explained. "You were murdered, so depending on whether you choose to partake in reincarnation or the counting, the information your assigned angel or demon gathered will prove to be useful."** _

_**"Reincarnation or counting?" I asked, brows furrowing in confusion. "I suppose that's why you called being a victim of murder 'lucky.'"** _

_**"It is lucky!" She proclaimed. "Murder victims are considered to have experienced unfair deaths, so in order to make up for that, you are given the opportunity to be reborn again so that you may experience a better ending. Of course, you can reject this offer and instead choose to partake in the counting, the counting of your good deeds and sins. Whether you end up with more good deeds than sins will determine whether you move onwards to heaven or downwards to hell."** _

_**I stayed silent, choosing to think over her words.** _

_**"You don't seem shocked," she pointed out. "Odd."** _

**_I looked up at her, my eyes coming in contact with her own. They were still unblinking, still unnerving, nonetheless I did not look away._ **

_**"Your system is stupid."** _

_**She finally blinked, taken aback.** _

_**"No offense to whoever created it, I am going to assume it was God and Satan, but such a system has surely resulted with a handful of good people going to hell." I paused, my eyes narrowing on her. "But I have a feeling you don't care for that."** _

_**Her smile widened.** _

_**"We don't," she confirmed. "We do not care if you are good or bad, we do not care about anything that may have taken place whilst you were alive. Life is a gift, you may do with it as you please, however what you please to do with it may result in you going to hell."** _

_**"So then you do care," I rebutted. "If you truly didn't then you wouldn't be marking down our good deeds and sins, you wouldn't be making us suffer the consequences."** _

_**"No, we truly don't care for what takes place in your life," she defended. "All we care for is what happened at the end of it: your death. Those who died of natural or accidental causes will go through the counting, whilst victims of homicide are given the choice of going through the counting or reincarnation."** _

_**"What about those who committed suicide?" I asked.** _

_**"They are punished."** _

_**"Huh?" I blinked.** _

_**What did she say?** _

_**"Committing suicide is committing the worst sin possible," she declared. "Life is a gift after all, and gifts are meant to be cherished, not thrown away. When a human commits suicide they are forced into the position of a reaper, so that they may be forced to witness what they threw away so easily everyday. In some cases, though they are extremely rare, the reaper shall be forgiven. But chances are they'll be forced to see others experience everything they want for the rest of eternity."** _

_**I stared at her.** _

_**"Aren't you a reaper?"** _

_**"Yes, I am," she nodded.** _

_**Silence hung between us as we stared at one another, the silence of a morbid truth: the woman before me had committed suicide. She had committed suicide and instead of being consoled in the afterlife, instead of being given an opportunity at another, much better, ending like victims of murder, she was instead punished. She was punished because was not happy with what had been given to her.** _

_**I frowned.** _

_**"How are sins and good deeds classified?" I asked. "How do angels and demons determine what belongs in what category?"** _

_**"Depending on the realm and it's views on what's morally right and wrong, the actions of a human will be classified as either a good deed or a sin," she revealed. "God and Satan do not hold their own system for such a thing, they simply let it fall to the hands of humans. Once more, this is because life is a gift and you may do with it as you please. That said, because it is a gift, ending it is classified as the biggest sin a human could ever commit. That, is their only opinion on the matter of right and wrong."** _

_**"Not even cursing them out?" I asked. "Or denying their existence?"** _

_**"They do not oversee the realms so they do not care," she revealed. "Angels and demons on the other hand will mark such things down."** _

_**I wasn't the most religious person when I was alive but upon hearing her words I couldn't help but pity those who were. No one was watching over them? So what of their prayers? Their preaching? I don't doubt many have been disappointed, devastated even, once they reached the afterlife to find that they spent their entire lives believing in a being who did not care.** _

_**"I've already explained the counting to you so let's move onto your other option: reincarnation." She explained, "When one is reborn they start off as a newly born baby, no memories held of their previous life. Much more, your angel and demon are reassigned." She beamed, "New angels are adorable! New demons are also quite amusing."** _

_**"Not that I'll take note of them," I pointed out.** _

_**"Correct, you won't take note of them," she nodded. "However, you can definitely count on them to take note of every single thing you do."** _

_**I grimaced. That was totally not creepy.** _

_**"We understand their sight would be a frightening one so they are not visible much less sensible," she explained. "It also prevents them, not that any have tried, to influence the actions of a their human being. We cannot have murder or suicide discouraged as we do not want to overpopulate heaven and hell."** _

_**"I see, it's just as I thought."** _

_**"Hm?" She tilted her head.** _

_**"This system really is stupid."**_

_**She blinked again, surprised.** _

_**"You call suicide the biggest sin a human could ever commit and yet you also encourage it," I pointed out. "I'll take your words to face value, you really don't care for what occurs in a human life, the entire reason you judge one's actions and most of all one's death is to see if they'll be taking up space in heaven or hell." I narrowed my eyes on her, "The entire purpose of this system is to benefit and feed into the arrogance of those who made it. It's stupid."** _

_**She stared at me, eyes wide in surprise. It was clear she hadn't heard such words before, though I highly doubted it wasn't because other's had thought the same, but because they didn't have the courage to say said thoughts out loud. A grim reaper was before me, and who knows if God or Satan were just down the hall as well, to say such things could possibly mean condemning me to hell. But I didn't care. Life was unfair and it was infuriating to see that the afterlife was the same.** _

_**"Don't think I'm blaming you or anything," I sighed. "I understand that you're simply the messenger here, another victim to this foolish system."** _

_**"Victim?" She blinked.** _

_**"What?" I rose a brow. "You don't truly believe you deserve the fate you were given, do you?"** _

_**She didn't respond. I didn't pressure her to.** _

_**"Moving on," I started, "You mentioned the fact that heaven and hell can be overpopulated. Is that the same for every realm? I'll need elaboration on that as well."** _

_**"You talk like a business woman," she pointed out, ignoring my questions. Reaching for my file once more, she flipped it open and let her eyes trail along its contents.** _

_**"I was a business woman," I stated. "Of sorts."** _

_**"You died at sixteen. . ." She muttered. Flipping a page in the file, her eyes widened as she took note of something written inside. "You're the daughter to the CEO of the L/n corporation! I suppose that's why you've been so serious, unlike every other human who's died, they always freak out or cry, you haven't done either."** _

_**"I've died," I shrugged. "Complaining isn't going to fix that."** _

_**Her eyes left the file, coming to meet my own.** _

_**"Is that so?" She closed the file, placing it back on the table. "But it seems to me less like you've accepted your fate and more as though. . .you don't care for it."** _

_**I stared back at her, expression void of any and all emotions. She did the same.** _

_**"I don't."** _

_**"Why?"** _

_**"Why do you ask?" I rebutted. "I thought what happens in my life is of no importance."** _

_**"To God and Satan," she clarified. Taking a seat on the other end of the table, she stared at me as she asked, "Why do you not care for the fact that you are dead?"** _

_**I didn't respond.** _

_**"Does it have something to do with the fact that. . .you always wanted to die?" Her eyes narrowed. "That you killed yourself?"** _

_**I don't know what reaction she was expecting out of me. Was it surprise? Anger? Fear? Whatever it was, it's clear by the look on her face that I had given her the exact opposite. I had given her nothing.** _

_**"So you knew," I bluntly noted.** _

_**"I. . ." She trailed off, brows furrowing in confusion. "I did."** _

_**"Hm. . .then why did you say I qualified for reincarnation and the counting?" I questioned. "Were you trying to trick me?"** _

_**"Well why did you agree?"**_

_**"I didn't." I pointed out, "This entire time, I never once confirmed that I had been murdered nor that I had killed myself. In the beginning, you told me I was lucky for my supposed fate, but all I said was. . .what's so lucky about being murdered?"** _

_**She stared at me, surprised. I took this an opportunity to continue talking.** _

_**"Did you think my words earlier were anger towards the fact that if I did confirm my suicide, I would be getting punished?" I asked. "If so, you're wrong. I genuinely find this entire system to be idiotic and unfair."** _

_**She opened her mouth to talk, but I cut her off.** _

_**"As for your question," I started, "You're right. I don't care for the fact that I died because I wanted to die. I'm sure this isn't the first time you've come across such a person, but I'll explain, being the daughter to the CEO of an important company does not correlate to happiness in life. I was better off than most, yes, but I was also subjected to misogyny, verbal abuse, and neglect at the hands of my parents. Having dealt with such things for an entire sixteen years of my life and not wanting to deal with it any longer, I chose to kill myself." I paused, narrowing my eyes on the woman. "Call me ungrateful, call me a sinner, tell me that I threw God and Satan's gift right back at them, I won't ever once regret my decision."** _

_**The woman gaped at me, taken aback by my words. It was clear she didn't know how to proceed, how to respond the blasphemy I had thrown her way.** _

_**"So," I started, "Can you answer my previous questions? We already know what fate I'm meant to meet, you don't need to continue on elaborating, but I would appreciate it if you did."** _

_**"I-" She stuttered. Standing up, she pushed in her chair and straightened her posture. Turning back to me, she brought forth that same forced smile from the beginning, dropping her true persona. "Can you restate your questions?"** _

_**"You mentioned that heaven and hell can become overpopulated." I asked, "Is that the same for every realm? I also want to know what these realms even are."** _

_**"Realms are different worlds, different universes. There are hundreds of thousands of them, each under God and Satan's authority," She revealed. "Every realm has it's own heaven and hell, and every heaven and hell has it's limits. It's the jobs of angels and demons to make sure there is a proper balance between both by marking down the good deeds and sins of their human all the while not discouraging murder or suicide as it's even better when the soul doesn't have to go to either place. It leaves more space."** _

_**I hummed, thinking over her words. "Is that so?"** _

_**"Fun fact!" She lifted a finger. "Every realm is connected in the form of stories. What may be a novel here is most definitely a world elsewhere."** _

_**"So if had been murdered and accepted the offer of reincarnation, I would have been isekai'd?"** _

_**"Correct!" She beamed.** _

_**"Cool," I muttered.** _

_**It would have been interesting to be reborn into a story, like Sherlock Holmes or Percy Jackson. Oh well.** _

_**"So, are we done now?" I asked.** _

_**She nodded, motioning towards the door.** _

_**I stood up, following her outside. The moment the conference room door was closed behind us she began leading me down the hall. I didn't fail to notice the elevator that awaited there, open.** _

_**"I suppose this is where we part," I stated, moving past her.** _

_**Just before I entered the elevator I took note of two buttons at the side, no doubt one of them would condemn me to my fate. Finding that there were none on the inside of the elevator, I proclaimed my theory to be true. She would be clicking the button, she would be finalizing my fate, and I wouldn't get the opportunity to try otherwise. Not that I was planning to.** _

_**"Where does this lead?" I asked.** _

_**She smiled at me from outside the elevator.** _

_**"Reaper headquarters." She pointed upwards. "Reincarnation." She pointed downwards.** _

_**"The counting?" I rose a brow.** _

_**"That would have been done by me," she revealed.** _

_**"I suppose another elevator leads to heaven and hell," I assumed.** _

_**"Correct."** _

_**Silence.** _

_**We stared at each other.** _

_**Stepping forward, I stopped midway through the doors, coming face to face with the woman, with the grim reaper. Before she could question my actions, I wrapped my arms around her, pulling her into a hug.** _

_**Her body was quick to go tense, probably from surprise, probably from discomfort, despite this I didn't let go.** _

_**"Do you remember your life?" I asked.** _

_**She hesitated, "I do."** _

_**"I'm sorry."** _

_**I heard her breath hitch.** _

_**I pulled back, allowed my eyes to meet hers for the last time. I hadn't noticed earlier but they were green, a very beautiful green. I couldn't help but wonder what those green eyes were subjected to viewing, how many tears they had been forced to shed. I couldn't help but wonder what lead to her suicide. I couldn't help but wonder if she knew she was not ungrateful, she was not a sinner, she had done her best.** _

_**"What was your name?" I asked.** _

_**"Elaine," She whispered and it seemed to have left her lips by accident.** _

_**"Elaine," I called, stepping back into the elevator. I sent her a smile, the last smile I would probably ever adorn. "Goodbye."** _

_**She stared at me, eyes wide and lips parted in surprise. Hesitantly, she moved her hand off to the side, to where the buttons were placed.** _

_**Before she clicked the button she sent me the most sincere smile I had seen from her this entire time.** _

_**And then I felt myself moving downwards.** _

* * *

You don't why she did it.

You don't know why Elaine clicked the button for reincarnation instead of the one that would lead you to your so-called punishment. Had your actions touched her heart? Had she felt that it would be unfair to submit another person to the fate of a reaper, a fate she knew was undeserved? You don't know and you suppose you never will. All you do know is that she had given you a second chance.

It's rather amusing, you thought, how flawed God and Satan's system was. You don't know if this is exactly their fault, you'll simply assume it is because in all honestly what's one more fuck up on their part? You'll simply assume that the reincarnations they dealt people, the opportunities for a better ending, were in fact not opportunities at all. After all, this life ended up being just as bad as the last one.

While your last family cut you with words, this one cut you with knifes. This family, the one consisting of just you and your mother, was one in which you were dealt daily beatings, drownings, burns, and suffocation. It was one that had forced you to become accustomed to pain, one that had forced you to start liking it because you didn't see survival otherwise.

An endless cycle of unfortunate and cruel deaths, is that what everyone was being subjected to when they were given the option of reincarnation? Is that what you were about to be subjected to?

It really was rather amusing, how flawed and unfair God and Satan's system was.

Your previous life was full of verbal abuse, sexist comments, and neglect. Being reborn, you were now in a world in which a woman who was raped would see her rapist in you and she would never allow you to make eye contact, never allow you to touch her, never allow you to do anything lest you wanted to be beaten, lest you wanted the impurity that was your father's features to be scrubbed off your skin till it bed. Your previous life was ended by your own hands because of the abuse you experienced, being reborn, this life would now end by your mother's hands who continued said abuse. Truly, it would be an endless cycle of unfortunate and cruel deaths.

How. . .amusing.

It was a good thing you now knew that none of it mattered.

Anything you did in this life, in this world, meant jack shit. No one was watching over you, not God and not Satan. The closest you came to having a guardian were the angel and demon assigned to you at birth, but even they dared not mettle with human affairs. You could do what you want, no matter how good or bad it was viewed in society's eyes, for it you were to be murdered then you could go unpunished for it.

And someone who chooses to give in to the darkness, to selfishness and sin, would most definitely be murdered.

You would most definitely be murdered.

You would most definitely apply for reincarnation.

So you can most definitely do whatever the fuck you wanted in this life.

Need stole into your mind like a deranged thief, taking what made you sane, planting dangerous ideas, seeding a new personality and muddling up the rest. Sparks of thoughts that you once would have dismissed as bizarre, wrong, and disgusting started to grow roots, deep roots. They began making sense in one revolutionary eureka moment after another, cascading out of control and luring you further and further until you were in so deep that you could no longer recognize your own mind. Your own self.

Smiling into the water, you placed either hand on either side of the bucket and pushed upwards. Your mother's grip was a strong one, holding you down harshly with everything in her, but yours was even greater. The return of your memories and newfound knowledge of the afterlife had brought forth need, the need to take hold of your life and do with it as you please, and you were not about to let it slip from your fingers before you even had the chance to begin. Determined and deranged, you pushed against your mothers hold until eventually your head broke through the water's surface and into the air.

A laugh escaped your lips.

Your head was pounding harshly. Having hit the rim of the bucket, having almost drowned, having your mother scream into your ears to 'stop fucking resisting', and most of all having the high irritating shrieks of your angel and demon shoot through your head were bringing forth a pain so grand were you not a paraphiliac you would've considered taking into consideration allowing your mother to drown you. Would it have counted as suicide? You did not know, much less care. You weren't about to commit it. Not again. Your head was pounding harshly and you loved it.

(What's going on!? Her body isn't functioning as it's supposed to!)

[What is she a fucking robot? Shut the hell up!]

(Code red! Code red!)

[I said sHUT UP! There's no such thing as code red!]

(Well there should be! Also please don't yell at me, I'm sensitive!)

[. . .aaAAGHHHH!]

(AAAGHHH!)

Your mother was still holding onto the back of your head, trying and failing to push you back down into the water. You ignored her. The air was biting at the wound on your head, bringing forth waves of pleasure you did not fail to divulge in.

(We need to do something! Now!)

"Stupid brat!"

[What the fuck is there to do? Just sit back, relax, and watch the fucking show.]

"Stop resisting!"

(This isn't a show! This is someone's life!)

"You need to be washed! You need to be cleansed!"

[Did you forget?]

"You impure child!"

Turning around, you came face to face with your mother. She froze, not having expected the sudden movement, and most of all not having expecting you to be grinning.

Your eyes bored into her own, the longest you had probably ever gotten the chance to as she had forbidden you from ever doing so. Every time you did you would be met with a slap to the face. The tamest of punishments in comparison to everything else.

She glared at you, raising her hand, "You b-!"

[Humans can do whatever they want with their lives.]

You punched her.

(NO!)

[YES!]

You cackled, raising your fist to deliver another blow.

(Stop! Stop! Please, stop!)

[FUCK YEAH! HIT HER WITH THE RIGHT HOOK! FUCK THAT BITCH UP!]

"You fucking brat!" Spitting out blood, your mother turned to you with the angriest eyes you had ever seen. The sight of them did nothing but fuel your excitement. "How dare you lay a hand on me! I'll fucking drown you!"

"Been there, done that, you failed each time." You paused, tilting your head. "Don't you think it's my turn now?"

"You fifthly child! You're deranged!" She shrieked. "You're just like that man, you're exactly like him! You like pain! You like hurting others! You like hurting me!" She screamed, "I'll fucking kill you!"

"Hm. . .just like that man?" You brought a finger to your lips. "I don't know. . ." you giggled, sending her a smile, "Maybe?"

She screamed, taking hold of your arm and throwing you onto the ground. The moment your back touched the grass she was quick to launch herself onto you, wrapping her fingers around your neck and squeezing. Once more were you experiencing an ever so familiar sensation, the sensation of being suffocated. It happened in your past life when you family forbid you from doing anything you pleased, and it happened often in this life when you mother would constantly attempt to drown or strangle you in your sleep. Unfortunately for the woman, you had grown quite tired of it.

Reaching upwards, your dug your fingers into your mother's eyes. She shrieked, her hold on you loosening as your nails dug into her sockets and drew blood. Eventually, her hands left your neck, coming to take hold of your wrists, though you didn't falter. Pressing the tips of your fingers down on her corners, you dug in deep, curling your fingers around the back of her eyes and ripping them out.

A scream from hell itself tore through the woman's throat, piercing the air. Blood dripped from her sockets and onto your face, though it only lasted momentarily as she fell onto her back, hands coming to hold onto her now empty sockets.

You sat up, catching your breath. Your mother wriggled in pain just a few feet away from you, sobs and screams of pain escaping her lips. You looked down at your hands, her eyes held delicately within them both.

You laughed.

"Well, now you never have to worry about me making eye contact with you."

Throwing aside her eyes, you got up and made your way towards her. She was rolling on the ground in pain, blood mixing in with dirt and leaves. Her hands were still holding onto her sockets, though they served no purpose, covered top to bottom in blood. Just like your hands were in burns.

You smiled. 

"Oh, stop it!" Reaching over, you took a fistful of the woman's hair, forcing her to sit up. She shrieked, wriggling in your hold. "You're getting aaall dirty," you spoke in a childlike voice, mocking. You leant down, coming to whisper in her face, "Now we have to give you a wash."

Her breath hitched. You laughed.

"NO! LET ME GO!" She screamed, beginning to squirm in your hold once again.

You ignored her, using all the strength in your twelve year old body to drag her over to the bucket.

"STOP!"

You pouted. "What's wrong? Don't you want to wash? Don't you want to be clean of your impurities?"

"LET ME GO!"

"Every single day you filled this bucket."

"I SAID LET ME GO!"

"And every single day you told me you would wash away my impurities."

"I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!"

"I wonder, did you ever get tired of it? Did you ever get tired of filling the bucket? Of scrubbing away at my skin? Of trying to drown me?"

"LET ME GO RIGHT NOW!"

You paused.

"I bet you enjoyed it."

She said nothing, simply trying and failing to get away. 

"I bet you liked it."

She squirmed, hands coming to claw on your own, on the scars she had inflicted on you all those years back.

"Well, let me tell you something. . .mommy~"

You leant down, coming face to face with the woman. Coming face to face with all the damage you had inflicted. Bruised skin, busted lips, and empty eye sockets. Blood dripped down her face like bloody tears. You couldn't help but grin at the sight of it all.

"I liked it too."

With that said, you plunged her head in the water.

Her reaction was an instant one, hands coming to claw at the sides of the wooden bucket. She squirmed underneath you, shaking her head and making it difficult to keep her in place. At the slip of your grip, she was quick to break through the barrier and yell:

"LET GO OF ME YOU DERANGED CHILD!"

You snickered, dunking her head back in.

(Vipra, no!)

[Vipra, yes!]

You pulled your mother out of the water, letting her catch her breath. As she did so, you allowed your eyes to trail down onto the bucket of water. The worn out sponge that had been used to dig into your back was now floating limply and what once was pure and clean water was now tainted in blood. What your mother once cared for so dearly, making sure it was always full, would now bring forth her death.

You couldn't help but wonder if, for the first time in her life, she regretted filling the bucket.

"Why are you struggling?"

You cast a glance at your mother, the last one you would ever take.

"Don't you know?"

You reached down, taking hold of the sponge and shoving it in her mouth.

"You're lucky to be murdered."

And with those last words, you plunged your mother's head underwater and kept it there. Your grip was strong, all the strength, all the emotions within you, had moved to the tips of your fingers to press down on her neck and squeeze. She struggled against you, thrashing, shaking, and squirming but you never once let up. Your hold on her was an accumulation of all the frustrations you had ever experienced, both in your previous and current life, as well as your eagerness. Your eagerness to get this over and done with, to leave the island, to explore the world, and to wreak havoc. Your eagerness to be selfish.

Slowly, but surely, your mother's movements had begun to turn sluggish. She thrashed less, shook less, until eventually. . .she stopped moving altogether.

You grinned.

"Waahh~!" You let out. "She's dead! Haha!"

(. . .)

[Oh shit.]

Letting go of your mother, you brought your hands up to your face. They were shaking but not in shock or fear of what you had done, but in excitement. Adrenaline and thrill was pumping through your veins, giving you a high your mother's beating could never reach. You laughed hysterically, staring down at the body of your now dead mother.

You fell onto your back, staring up at the sky.

"Ah~" You sighed, a pleased smile coming to rest on your lips. You lifted your hands up high, examining them. Your mother's blood stained your fingers, stained the scars she had given you all that time ago. Your smile widened at the sight. "Who knew hurting someone was even more fun than getting hurt? Hehe. . ."

(. . .)

[Okay. . .maybe there should be a code red.]

Placing your hands atop your cheeks, not caring for the blood on them, you stared up at the sky.

"Maybe."

(!!!)

[Did she just respond to me!?]

(Uh, ah, no! She's probably just. . .thinking. I mean, that'd be physically impossible. . .eheh. . .I hope.)

"And so should be getting the memories of previous life, but here were are~" You giggled. "Nice to meet you two~!"

(. . .)

[. . .]

"Hm?"

(AAAGHHH!)

[AAAAGHHH!]

"Ow-!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ha·mar·ti·a  
> noun  
> a fatal flaw leading to the downfall of a tragic hero or heroine.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> fuck 'em kids

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> super late update but writers block hit me like a bitch. i made a playlist for this fic to help get me out of it. if you're interested you can listen to it [here.](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/6Ei1uRoIBDjQc4kzINoFBT)
> 
> this chapter is kind of an info dump, full of things that need to be established before we get to the good stuff. it ended up being a little too long for my taste so i cut it in half. i hope you enjoy!
> 
> Italics = thoughts
> 
> Bold italics = memories

(-AAAAAAAAAAGHHHHH-)

[Okay chicken wings, it's been a good five minutes now, get over your existential crisis.]

(-AAAAAGHHHH-)

[ 눈_눈 ]

"You're having a verbal conversation, how did you-?"

(-AAAAAGGHHHH-)

[SHUT UP!]

You flinched.

( . . .sorry. . .╥﹏╥)

[Our head is hurting here, alright? Screw off.]

"Ours?" You rose a brow.

[Yes, ours, bitch. Your head is our head.]

"I thought you two were your own entities?" You asked, brows furrowing. "I can't see you but I figured you were both just floating around my shoulders or something."

(We. . .*sniffle*. . .we're supposed to be but. . .but-)

[But for some fucking reason we're not! Same reason you got your memories back, I guess.]

You hummed thoughtfully, touching the wound on your head. "I suppose it's 'cause of this?" You giggled, observing the blood on your fingertips. "My mother did bash my head in pretty hard, didn't she? Maybe I'm just hallucinating from the injury, and none of this is real. That'd be a funny thought."

(It's very real (・・ ) though I cannot begin to understand how or why.)

[It's also super annoying.]

"Hm. . .well, I don't mind it!" You beamed. "I'll get to have company on my trip."

(Company? Trip? (・・? ) Where? ( ﾟｰﾟ) )

[Anywhere else! Obviously she can't stay here anymore, dumbass! She just killed her mother!]

(Oh right. . .OH MY GOD, VIPRA, YOU KILLED YOUR MOM!)

You paused, frowning.

"That's not my name."

(Eh?)

"My name isn't Vipra," you declared, voice stern. "My name is Y/n. Y/n L/n."

( ∑（´△｀○ !! Eh-? Okay. . .)

[. . .]

Vipra Archer.

That was what you had been named upon being born into this world. Your mother hadn't given it to you, the one she had given and always used was 'disgusting child.' No, Vipra Archer came from the villagers who were present at your birth. Vipra for having been born under a full moon, and Archer from your neighbor who did not wish for you to go by your father's last name due to the disgusting actions he had committed upon your mother. That said, your mother had never once referred to you by it.

You didn't hate the name, it rolled off the tongue quite well you would admit. It was simply a matter of holding more attachments to your previous one.

In your previous life, you were known as the daughter to the CEO of the L/n corporation. A company that manufactured a variety of technological products like phones, laptops, etc. To be born into such a family was to be born with a crown on your head, unfortunately society stood too far and with too much awe to take note of the fact that the crown was not as perfect as it appeared to be. Cracks, scratches, smears of blood and stains of tears, it weighed heavy upon your head. And what does one do when something they wear does not fit comfortably, when it hurts, and it makes them miserable to look in the mirror?

They take it off.

It wasn't an easy task, ending your life. Whilst being a L/n was miserable you found that being a person in general was not. There were others in your life who brought forth happiness and hope, unfortunately such things were always quick to be crushed at the hands of your parents. However, they did not exist in this world. Instead, you were given new parents; a dad whom had long left and a mother whom you've just killed. With no one to hold you down any longer you can polish and fix your old crown, you can adorn it like you had always meant to.

You can turn the miserable name that is Y/n L/n into what you had always wanted it to be.

"I have some questions," you spoke up.

(!!!)

[What.]

"Well, first off, what are your names?"

[Don't have any.]

(We do have numbers though! I'm angel #318220314326.)

"That's. . .a long number," you sweat-dropped. Chuckling, you asked, "Well, what about gender?"

(We don't have any!)

"So you're nyan-binary."

(Nyan?)

"Nyan."

[Stop.]

"That reaper I spoke to," you started, "she kind of made it seem like you guys would be. . .babies? Do you have an age, or. . .?"

[We age with you.]

(Mhm! That's correct! We're all twelve right now!)

"Oh shit, we're all going through puberty together."

[Don't say it like that!]

You giggled.

"So like, can you guys hear my thoughts or do I have to talk out loud to you two?"

(As your assigned angel and demon we have an attachment to your soul. This allows us to stray away but never lose you. That said. . .for some odd reason, we're not in our physical forms right now. We're residing within you, but we won't see or listen to anything you don't want us to.)

[Speak for yourself chicken wings.]

(Demon >^< !!! No peaking into our human's mind!)

"That reaper told me you guys aren't allowed to influence the actions of your human being," you pointed out. "That said, you guys do seem to hold a strong sense of right and wrong."

(Ah! Well. . .We're not allowed to but that doesn't mean we don't want to. At least, I do. I think it's important to be a good person!)

[And I think it's important that if you're going to hell, you might as well go down a winner. Get the biggest high score of sinning ever and reign supreme among all those other losers, haha!]

(Demon, no!)

You giggled.

[Whatever, it's not like this bitch can sin anyway.]

"Excuse me?" You rose a brow. "You don't think I can sin?"

[In this world? No. You barely have nine sins on you.]

"Wait, nine?" You asked incredulously. "Seriously?"

[It's 'cause this world is so fucked up.]

"What do you mean?"

[I mean that this world is way too relaxed when it comes to what's considered bad. The line of right and wrong might as well be the same one. It makes marking your sins down so fucking boring.]

(What demon means is that the amount of things that qualify as a sin in this realm are small. Not that surprising when you consider what this world holds: treasures, hidden enclaves, magic, etc!)

"Wait, wait, magic?" You blinked. "Where am I?"

(In your previous world, this realm is known as the popular Japanese manga: HunterxHunter!)

You had nothing to say.

(. . .?)

What was there to say?

(Y/n?)

[Haha, you broke her.]

( Σ(°ロ°) ! )

In truth, the demon was not far off in his assumption. The words of the angel had brought forth a shock so bad that you could do nothing but stare up at the sky, eyes wide and lips parted. You probably looked like an idiot. You felt like an idiot.

_How didn't I realize this earlier?_

Memories rushed through your head, memories of staying up late at night reading the popular Japanese manga. Memories of binging the anime, both the 1999 and 2011 version. Memories of the hunter exam, the Zoldyck manor, York New City, Greed Island, and much more. Things that, throughout your short life here, you had not failed to hear about. Albeit small, your island was a perfect stopping point for ships and resting stop for it's passengers. When stopping by the harbor you would often find yourself conversing with travelers, adventurers, and most importantly: hunters. They spoke of places far and wide, places such as Glam Gas Land and it's top tier entertainment, of York New and it's towering skyscrapers, of heavens arena where you could get paid to fight. They spoke of placed you had read about in the manga, all those restless night ago, because of the fact that you were now in said manga.

Elaine had reincarnated you into the world of HunterxHunter.

Suddenly, ripping from your throat and surprising both your companions and you, was a laugh.

And then another.

And another.

Before you knew it you were laughing loudly into the air, hysterical. Everything felt surreal, everything probably looked surreal. You were laying on the front lawn of your house covered in blood, blood from your mother who's corpse was just a few feet away. If anyone saw you now they would surely assume that you had lost your sanity. Maybe you had, maybe you hadn't, but whether insanity was involved as well you knew that the reason for your laughter came from excitement. Excitement at the fact that you had been reincarnated into one of the best world's possible.

HunterxHunter is a world with a beautifully crafted magic system, albeit somewhat confusing. People can manipulate and make use of their own life force to hunt down anything and everything they want.

And you want it all.

You want the hidden treasures, you want to visit the ruins of what once was a proud castle, you want to delve into the mysterious unknown and never look back. No longer shall you hear stories of passing hunters, instead you will make your own. You shall experience everything this world has to offer, even at the cost of because another villain in the main character's story. In Gon's story. So what if the boy put you in the same category he did the adult trio? You were going to do what you want and get you want.

You deserved it after all.

In your previous life you could do nothing, get nothing, for you were nothing. And in this life, it was meant to stay the same. But the return of your memories have blessed you, allowing you full control of yourself, and you weren't going to let it go to waste, you weren't going to let Elaine's actions go to waste. You had been reborn into the best world you could've ever hoped for. A world full of riches and fortune. A world for the taking.

"Hey. . ." you called out, calming your laughter. "You know everything about this world. . .right?"

(Uh. . .yes? It is information given to us right after being created.)

"Where am I?"

(Huh?)

"What part in the story am I? How old are Gon and Killua?"

(They. . .they're six years old at the moment.)

"So we have a six year age gap. . ." you trailed off, thoughtful.

[Hey, idiot.]

(Yes?)

[Not you.]

"Me?" You blinked.

[Yeah, you. What are you planning to do?]

"Something I always wanted to do."

[Which is?]

You grinned.

"Wreak havoc."

* * *

[So much for wreaking havoc.]

"Fuck you."

[So much for being a bad bitch.]

"Fuck off."

[You look like a fucking idiot right now.]

"You sound like a fucking idiot."

(Guys. . . o(･´д･｀o)))三(((o´･д｀･)o . . .please don't fight.)

You sighed. As much as you hated to admit it, and you truly did hate it, demon was right in saying you looked like an idiot. You felt like an idiot. Why? Because you were currently in a garbage truck, stuck between piles of rotting food and broken objects. A shard of glass was poking at your ribs and you feared that if the truck were to meet one bump on the road then your lungs would cease to exist.

(Are you uncomfortable? ｡•́︿•̀｡ )

"Extremely," You muttered.

[Your fault.]

You couldn't disagree with that. Having willingly put yourself in this situation, you shall now deal with the consequences, no matter how uncomfortable they made you feel. You just had to keep reminding yourself why you had hitched a ride on a garbage truck to begin with; it was heading straight for Meteor City.

While you weren't certain, you had a feeling that if others were to become aware of the fact that they had been isekai'd into HunterxHunter, they'd avoid Meteor City like the plague. That is, if they could even find it to begin with.

An unknown junkyard with even more unknown people, none of them holding official records, Meteor City was a difficult find. Your companions only knew what the manga had revealed as well as what God and Satan had given them, which when combined, wasn't much. It was five-hundred years old, founded by a dictator wanting to separate the human race, and most importantly: it was used as a dumping sight for other countries. Anything and everything that was unwanted was thrown onto the city, including people.

You were currently about to become one of those people.

[Why are you doing this again?]

"Well for starters, who lives in Meteor City again?"

[A bunch of fucking losers.]

(The Phantom Troupe!)

"Bingo!" You snapped your fingers.

[You suicidal fucking maniac. Are you trying to meet the Phantom Troupe?]

"Something like that," you revealed. "I want to meet the Phantom Troupe, or rather, a member of the Phantom Troupe. I'm thinking Phinks or Shalnark? Mm. . .no, maybe Franklin? Someone nice."

[They're the fucking Phantom Troupe, they're anything but nice. Why the fuck do you want to meet them?]

"Oh!" You perked up, ignoring the demon. "Maybe that doll maker, the one with a dead sister, Omokage was it? I feel like he'd agree, so long as he gets the opportunity to clone me or whatever it is that he does. At this point, he should still be with the troupe, correct?"

(Correct.)

[Don't ignore me!]

"Hm?" You tilted your head, ignoring the shard of glass that was right beside it. "What's wrong?"

[The problem is that you want to meet the Phantom Troupe, Vipra!]

Your eyes sharpened into a glare.

"That's not my name."

[Vipra, Y/n, same bitch different body. Now, answer my fucking question. You do realize meeting the Phantom Troupe is suicidal right? They'll kill you.]

You couldn't help but smile at the prospect.

[Freak.]

"Paraphiliac," you corrected.

[Same difference.]

(Demon, you shouldn't kink shame!)

"Mhm," you nodded. "As for your earlier question, it's honestly quite simple: I want to learn nen."

(You want to learn magic?)

"Yes, and not just from anybody either," you revealed. "While I have no doubt I would have enjoyed myself in another world such as the novels of Sherlock Holmes, I think I got quite lucky being reincarnated into HunterxHunter. After all, HunterxHunter holds a variety of riches and fortunes. If I were to get strong enough, I could get such riches, I could get anything and everything I want."

As you spoke, you failed to notice your lips curling. You failed to notice the excitement bubbling up inside of you at the prospect of reaping this world for all it had to offer.

"The key to such strength lies within nen. Only those who know of it are capable of getting what they want," you proclaimed. "The Phantom Troupe are a prime example. They get what they want, whenever they want, because they are too strong for people to stop otherwise. In order to fall into the same category as them, a category which will allow me to reign supreme and do as I please, I need to learn from them."

(. . .)

[You really are a suicidal maniac, you know that right?]

You laughed.

"If there's one thing I learned in my previous life is to never settle for anything that does not satisfy my needs." You explained, "If I ask for a tv advertisement on our newest product, I will get a tv advertisement on our newest product. I don't care if advertising it on a billboard costs lest, I don't care if it will suffice, if I know that having a commercial circled around our product will bring in more buys I will settle for nothing but that commercial."

[Your employees must have hated you.]

"Whilst they weren't technically mine, I did boss them around a bit," you revealed. "The point is, I don't want to learn just the basics of nen, nor do I want to reach a decent enough level at it, I want to reach a high one, a strong one. I want nen taught to me by someone who is almost at the level of a master, by someone who can push me to my limits, someone who I can be proud to call an equal one day. If such a possibility exists, I will take it, no matter how dangerous." You paused, glancing around at your surroundings. "Or uncomfortable."

[So that's why you went through all this bullshit.]

"Exactly!" You beamed.

After having come to the realization that you were born into HunterxHunter, you were quick to decide that you would need to learn nen, preferably from a member of the Phantom Troupe as they were some of the strongest people in the entire world. However, the only place you could imagine finding them in was Meteor City, a junkyard with no location.

You weren't certain about your plan at first, but you figured that if you were to go to a continents main garbage sight, a place where trash that couldn't be recycled was dumped, then you would eventually find yourself in Meteor City as someone would no doubt want to clear said trash out. The Yurobian continent was the closest one to your small island so you went there straight away. It wasn't difficult to find the location of their main garbage sight, but living within it sure was. You had to spent an entire week at said dump before you found yourself being thrown into a garbage truck, a garbage truck headed straight for Meteor City if you heard the workers correctly.

If you hadn't, you would murder them.

Suddenly, snapping you out of your thoughts, the truck came to a stop.

(Are we there yet?)

"I don't- WAH!"

(Y/N!)

[What the fuck?]

You groaned, a heavy weight falling atop your body. Upon opening your eyes, you found a pile of garbage laying atop you. Spoiled food was thrown on your head, a broken television had taken place on your stomach, and other broken, dirty, miscellaneous objects were strewn about your body.

"Why do I have to be such a perfectionist?" You muttered to yourself.

After shaking your head of it's rotting contents you proceeded to shove off the television as well as every other item that was thrown atop you. The moment your field of vision was cleared you were met with the sight of the garbage truck driving away.

You deadpanned.

"Did I just get dumped?"

[Did your plan seriously work?]

(Omg!!)

"Huh?"

Looking around you, you found yourself being surrounded by garbage as far as the eye could see. Scattered clothes, broken technology, ruined furniture, rotting food, remains of what once were proud buildings, anything and everything was thrown about before you. The pollution and dirt gathered from all these objects brought forth a foul smell to your nose and an even more foul sight to the sky. Tainted red, beautiful blue was no more. White clouds were thin and grey, losing everything that once made them a joyful sight. It was as if you had be thrown into an apocalyptic world.

"Is this. . .?" You trailed off, excitement beginning to build up within you.

[Unfortunately.]

You grinned.

(We made it to Meteor City! Ｏ(≧▽≦)Ｏ Yay!)

Laughing, you stood up. Your head turned wildly, taking in anything and everything that was within sight.

A desolate land of ruins, that is the place you stood upon, one made especially for the outcasts of the world. And one of those outcasts was about to be your ticket to gaining all the power you could ever want. The very idea filled you with eager excitement, prompting your legs to move forward.

When you had left your island you took with you a small backpack packed with the bare necessities: food, water, clothes, and money. The money was spent making your way to Yurobian continent whilst the rest was used throughout your time waiting at it's garbage dump. Thankfully, you used said objects sparingly. You had yet to change your clothes, disgustingly so, and your food and water were only halfway finished. It would, hopefully, be just enough to last you until you came across a member of the Phantom Troupe.

Whilst you were hoping to come across one of the lower ranked members, someone with a kinder personality, you didn't mind it if your teacher ended up being someone as difficult as Machi. The only person whom you did refuse to work under was Chrollo, the leader of the Phantom Troupe. You were a perfectionist, and yes you were also suicidal, but you still refused to take risks with that man, at least for the time being. He would kill you on sight, and if by some miracle he did indeed choose to give you the time of day, chances were he'd simply help you create an ideal ability for him to steal.

Kind is not how one would describe the Phantom Troupe, they were a band of thieves and murderers after all, and it's also the main reason you were certain if one were to find out they got isekai'd into HunterxHunter they'd avoid Meteor City or any other place/person they knew the troupe to be associated with. They did not care for others, all they cared for was themselves, which was understandable considering their upbringing. Most of them, the original members of the troupe, had been abandoned at birth in Meteor City. To be abandoned as if they were nothing, in a place that is nothing, it's not a surprise that they gained the selfish and greedy personalities that they did. You know this, and so you know that no member of the troupe will be kind much less easily accepting of your offer, but you also know that there's still a possibility. It's slim, it's dangerous, but it's a possibility nonetheless.

"Alright!" You dusted yourself off. "Let's get started!"

[Can we start with your clothes? You probably reek.]

You glanced down at yourself. Tears, stains, and dirt ruined your clothing and brought forth an appearance you definitely did not want holding upon meeting a member of the troupe. After all, first impressions are everything.

Listening to the demon, you changed your clothes. Whilst you still smelled, a fresh pair of clothes wasn't about to wash away all the sweat and dirt you had accumulated during your wait, at the very least you looked more presentable than before. You also made sure to fix your hair, having not done so in a while. As you did so, you were vaguely aware of the discomfort growing within your stomach.

The return of your memories were a blessing but they made things such as changing and doing your own hair odd. At times, you found yourself expecting your hair to be a color it no longer is, or just shying away from your body in general. It's not a matter of feeling uncomfortable within your body, rather, it's a matter of feeling uncomfortable with it's appearance.

Your old body was that of a sixteen year old, a Japanese teen with Japanese features. Now, your was s/c, your eyes were e/c, and your hair was h/c, features common to those in your island. Features common to your new people. People whom, you realized only just recently, were inspired by Mexican and Indian culture. The native language of your island, separate from the one normally used throughout HunterxHunter, was even a combination of Spanish and Hindi.

"Look at the bright side demon," you spoke out loud to the being in your head, whom was still complaining about your rash decision to come to Meteor City, "if I die then I won't have to go through puberty again!"

[If you die then we die!]

"In which you won't have to see me go through puberty again."

[I hate you.]

You laughed.

(Um. . .guys. . .)

"Yes~?"

(Someone's watching you.)

You smiled.

"I know."

(???)

[What the fuck.]

"Switch."

Switch, a code-word you had formed with the holy beings after realizing that talking to them out loud could prove to be difficult at times. Difficult in the sense that you garnered way too much attention. You didn't want the two beings to listen in on your thoughts, but you realized it would be necessary at times, and right now was one of those times.

Carefree, you hummed as you continued on walking, secretly talking to the two inside your head, as if you weren't aware of the person trailing you from behind. Someone you had taken note of not even a minute into arriving at the Junkyard.

_This city is inhabited by ten million people, while I'm unaware of how big it is, I'm also not going to be surprised if someone is nearby. Neither should you two._

[Aren't you concerned?]

(You should leave the area V- I mean, Y/n, they could be dangerous!)

[I thought we've established she likes danger.]

_It's fine, I don't think a child can be of much danger._

[You're a child and you murdered your mother.]

_Touché._

Halting in your steps, you spoke out loud, "I know you're there, you can come out." You paused, a sly grin coming onto your face as you said, "I won't bite."

Silence.

No movements.

You turned your head to the left, eyes nailing themselves atop a pile of debris.

"Well?" You rose a brow. "Are you not going to come out?"

[See if I was them I wouldn't come anywhere near you either.]

_Rude. Now get out of my head._

Taking off your bag, you reached inside to take hold of a can of fruit. Slipping your bag back on, you turned to fully face the pile of debris. There were no movements, no sounds, nothing that insinuated someone was behind it and watching. But you knew better.

Stepping forward, you shook the can.

"Fruit," you stated, "I'll give you some."

A shift, barely audible, but you managed to catch it.

Taking another step forward, you opened the can of fruit.

"Have you ever had pineapple? How about peaches?" You asked. "There's some mango in here too."

A small peak of the head. Violet eyes trained themselves on the can in your hand, curious.

"Mango?" You heard a small whisper.

"You ever had it?" You asked.

"What's mango?" They spoke up once more, this time more audible than before. "What's fruit?'

"You've never had fruit before?" You asked, before realizing who you were talking to. Someone who had been dumped in Meteor City at birth, or born and raised there, probably didn't know about half of the things that made up the rest of the world. "C'mere and I'll let you have it."

Eyes shifted from the can and onto you, suspicious.

You smiled reassuringly, hoping to ease them up.

Hesitantly, they stood straight. Although it didn't add much to their height. They slowly made their way over the pile of debris. The moment they were in full view you were able to determine that the person whom had been stalking you was a boy, probably ten or eleven, with brown hair and violet eyes.

Instantly, you handed him the can of food and instantly he began to gobble it down, taking handfuls of the fruit and shoving it into his mouth. He had clearly been starving.

[Gross.]

(Demon!! He probably hasn't eaten in a long time!)

[I don't care. Fuck 'em kids.]

You stood there, smiling, the entire time the boy ate his food. Once he was done and the can was thrown away, you were acknowledged once more.

"Who are you?" He asked.

"Shouldn't I be asking you that?" You tilted your head. "You were the one who started following me."

"You came here on one of those trucks," he pointed out, "and you were talking to yourself."

"I wasn't talking to myself." You beamed, "I was talking to an angel and demon!"

[This bitch-]

The boy narrowed his eyes on you.

"You're weird."

"So I've been told," you said. "Anyway, what's your name?"

"Name?" He tilted his head. "I don't have a name."

"Everyone has a name," you said, putting on a false frown. "Even the angel and demon in my head have one, although they're really just big numbers." You paused, putting on a thoughtful expression. "How about Violet?"

"Violet?"

"It's the color of your eyes," you pointed out.

"My eyes?"

"You haven't seen yourself?" You asked, genuinely surprised. "Are there no mirrors here? Not even a shard?" You glanced around, perking up when your eyes landed on a broken of glass. "Ah!" You picked up the shard, turning to the boy. "Look-"

You were startled by him running away.

He didn't move too far, just a few feet away, but he had done so with a speed that told you he was afraid.

"Don't worry~" You smiled. "I'm not going to stab you, not without consent anyway. I just want you to look at your reflection. It might be a little funky since this is glass but you should see it nonetheless."

"My. . .reflection?" He tilted his head, curious.

It took a few moments of the boy glancing between the shard of glass and you before he determined that you were of no threat. The moment the shard was within his grasp, he glanced at his reflection, eyes widening upon taking note of the color you had spoken about.

"This is. . .violet?" He muttered.

"Mhm!" You beamed. "That's the color of your eyes! Aren't they pretty?"

The boy didn't respond, instead prompting to admire himself.

"How about making it your name?" You asked once more. "It has a nice ring to it."

[Isn't Violet a girl's name?]

"Who cares about genders norms?" You asked.

"Huh?" The boy turned to you.

"Sorry," you said with a smile, pointing to your head. "I was talking to demon."

The boy sweat-dropped, dropping the shard of glass. "Weirdo."

All you did was laugh.

"So, Violet, now that I've given you food and helped you pick out a name," you paused, eyes narrowing on him, "how about you do something for me as well?"

"I didn't agree to that being my name." The boy huffed, crossing his arms. "What do you want?"

You smiled.

"How well do you know this city?"

"I've been here all my life," he revealed.

"Really? That sucks." You chose to ignore the glare he sent you. "How well do you know it's inhabitants?"

The people in Meteor City held complicated relations with one another. Their bonds were thinner than water and yet thicker than blood, to the point that they were ready to lay down their lives for one another, most likely a result of indoctrination. Violet was young, and it was also clear that due to the way he was hesitant in approaching you, that he had yet to gain this mindset.

A perfect person to manipulate.

"Not that much," he admitted, confirming your thoughts. "I mean, I know about the assembly, but I don't talk to them or anyone else."

"Oh~?" You mused. "Do you not like them~?"

As he thought over your question, he failed to notice your expression: narrowed eyes and a wide grin. You leered down at him with the look of one who was up to no good. And you weren't. Lady luck seemed to be on your side; giving you your memories back, successfully taking you to Meteor City, and now finding you a person to exploit. You would make good use of these opportunities.

"It's not that I don't like them," the boy spoke up. "It's just. . .hard to talk to them? Some people survive by themselves, some survive in groups. They're all weird. I just- I don't know how to approach them. I don't know how to trust them."

"That's true," you noted. "In a place such as this, where food is scarce and shelter is difficult to find, it's everyone for themselves." You leant down, coming to meet the boy's eyes. "You can't trust anyone but yourself."

He tensed but didn't shy away. It was clear that while your words unsettled him, he agreed with them.

"Aren't you tired of that?"

"Huh?" He blinked, surprised.

"Aren't you tired of having to fight for yourself? Of having to avoid other people lest they hurt you and take what you own?" You paused, making sure your words sunk in. "Aren't you tired of living here?"

"I. . I-" He stuttered. "I. . ."

"You know, in the outside word, no one knows about this place," you revealed.

"Huh?"

"No one knows this place exists. No one's meant to know this place exists." You leant down, coming to whisper in his ear, "This place is unknown, because everyone who lives here, because you who live here, aren't meant to be known."

His breath hitched.

"This place is nothing to the outside world, it's treated as nothing by the outside world," you paused, "you are nothing."

"I. . ."

You stepped back, the smile on your face having gotten wider than before.

"I mean, it was just minute ago you finally got yourself a name," you paused, eyes narrowing on the boy who had begun to adorn a terrified expression, "it wasn't until just a minute ago that you had a sense of self."

You motioned around you both.

"Look around," you said, "this place is a junkyard. It's nothing more than a garbage sight, a place to dump unwanted and unnecessary items." You pointed at the boy. "Kind of like you~"

The moment those words left your lips the boy began to shake. He glanced around, eyes wide and frantic. It was clear that he had finally come to realize what the place he stood upon was and what he meant as an inhabitant. It was clear he had finally realized that his life was nothing. He was nothing. No one in the outside world knew about Meteor City, knew about him, and it wasn't until you had arrived that he didn't either. The boy hadn't even known what his own eyes looked like.

"What's with that expression~? Are you scared~?" You asked, tone mocking. "You know, that's why so many of the people here are dangerous. They argue, fight, and kill one another to survive. Isn't that funny? In their attempts to become someone, to become human, they instead end up becoming animals who only know how to bare their teeth. They fail to realize that surviving is not living."

"But-" the boy spoke up, gaining your attention. His voice was shaky as he asked, "but what else is there to do?"

"Well, if it's here, then nothing," you bluntly noted. "This is the type of place in which if you don't survive then you'll die, but surviving isn't living. So no matter what you do and how much you wish, you can't make a life for yourself here."

The boy looked as if he had lost all hope in that instant, eyes turning dark and lips pulling downwards.

You couldn't help but be amused.

"Of course," you started, speaking slowly to make sure he heard every word, "all you have to do is get out of here."

"Huh?" He blinked. "But how-?"

"Everything here is brought in from someplace else," you cut him off. "If I was able to find my way into this city then I can also find my way out." You paused. "I know my way out."

Instantly, he perked up.

"You know how to get out of here!?" He eagerly asked. "You know how to leave?"

"Of course I do," you said. "I wouldn't come to this place if I didn't know there was a way to leave it. I don't want to spend the rest of my life here after all, not for something as temporary as what I'm going to do."

"Temporary?" He asked, tilting his head. "What are you going to do? Why did you visit this place? How did you even find it?"

"That's a lot of questions and a lot of answers I don't care to give," you said, brushing him off.

"Wha-? But-!"

"Unless—" you cut him off —" you help me."

"Help you?" He asked.

"Mhm!" You beamed. "Answer a few of my questions, maybe even act as my guide for a bit, and I'll tell you how to leave Meteor City. I'll even tell you what to do once you've left!"

"Really?" He asked, eyes now beginning to sparkle with hope.

You grinned.

"Really."

"Then. . ."

"Hm?" You rose a brow.

"Then. . .then I guess I'll do it," he declared. "I'll help you."

"It's a deal then?" You outstretched your hand.

He glanced down at your hand, hesitating for a second before outstretching his own and shaking it.

"Deal."

Your grin widened.

[You're an evil bitch, you know that?]

(Y/n. . .isn't there a better way to find the troupe? I don't like this method. . .)

_It's a such a shame I don't have a guilty conscience, and therefore, don't care! I'm manipulating the child and making use of him. It's not my fault he's perfect for it. He's yet to get attached to his upbringing as well as those around him. He won't think twice about selling out the other inhabitants because I'm offering him an opportunity to get out of here. Like I said, he's perfect for it._

[You do realize you've just committed a handful of sins?]

_And you said I couldn't do it._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ha·mar·ti·a  
> noun  
> a fatal flaw leading to the downfall of a tragic hero or heroine.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> mission: success

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> rushed a little there on the ending
> 
> italics = thoughts
> 
> bold italics = memories
> 
> (parenthesis) = angel
> 
> [brackets] = demon

"So. . .what's your name?"

You cast a glance at the boy across from you. Sitting in the remains of what once a proud building, under the night sky, it was somewhat difficult to see his face. Nonetheless, the fire you had managed to create between you two did enough to illuminate his features. Brown skin with even browner hair and a pair of bright violet eyes that had garnered him his name. You were starting to become accustomed to this face.

"You never told me it," he spoke up, snapping you out of your thoughts. He picked up a nearby stick, throwing it into the fire. "You never told me your name."

"It's Y/n," you revealed. "My name is Y/n."

"Y/n?" He muttered. "That's a weird name."

[Wait till you find out about yours.]

You snorted.

"What?"

"Hm?" You glanced over at Violet. "It's nothing," you said, waving him off.

"Is it those voices in your head again?"

"Something like that."

"Weirdo."

All you did was smile at that.

"So. . ."

"Yes?"

"Are you going to tell me what it is you need help with?" He asked.

"I'm waiting."

"Waiting?" He asked. "What for?"

"For you to ask me about the outside world."

No response, although you heard him shift in his seat.

"You want to know, don't you?" You asked. "You want to know about what's outside of the city, about how to get there, about what you'll need to do once you get there." You cast him another glance, that same smile still on your face. "I'll tell you right now but once I do you won't be able to back down from our deal."

"I can back down?" He asked, eyes widening in surprise.

"Sure," you said, shrugging. "I wouldn't ever force another person to do something they don't want to."

[Liar.]

"I'll tell you what it is I need help on, and if you do choose to give me that help, then I'll tell you what you want to know after the deed is done. Of course, if you don't help then I won't tell you anything," you said. "If you want to know right now then you can no longer back down from our deal," you turned to the boy, eyes narrowing on him, "and if you do try to do so then I'll torture you."

He tensed, eyes widening in fear, but all you did was send him a smile.

"I. . ."

[Don't you think you're pushing your luck?]

(Demon's right. If you keep threatening Violet then-)

"Then nothing is going to change," you whispered.

(Huh?)

"Look at him," you whispered, casting the boy a glance. He was staring into the fire with wide, fearful eyes. But it wasn't fear at the prospect of being tortured by your hands, no, it was fear at the idea of not getting the information you had to offer. Fear at the prospect of never getting to leave Meteor City. "He wants to leave this place with ever fiber in his being. He's sick and tired of having to spend his nights like this. He wants my information, and he wants it now, he won't ever get another chance like this after all. Since he probably doesn't want to let his fear get in the way later on, he's going to ask me right now."

You paused, narrowing your eyes on the boy.

"In three, two, one-"

"I want to know now!" Violet declared, eyes coming to meet your own in determination. You couldn't help but grin at the sight. "I want you to tell me everything I need to know."

"Well, first I need to know, have you ever met the mafia?" You asked.

"Mafia?" He perked up. "Do you mean the men in suits?"

"Bingo!" You snapped your fingers. "They're one of your tickets out of here. They like hiring people from Meteor City because you guys don't have any official records, making you perfect for assassination jobs. If you go with them, you'll immediately be given a home, with food, and other people. Though, those people might not be so kind. You'll be trained to kill and torture, and probably how to prevent being killed and endure torture. You'll be given everything you could ever want but it'll come at a great cost."

At your words, the boy's eyes widened. He took in everything you said with surprise and small fear. However, you didn't give him the time to process it all, immediately moving on.

"The next way to get out of here is the way I came in," you revealed. "Hitch a ride on one of the garbage trucks that stop by, or any other engine that drops trash. This is the more difficult route. You'll be on the vehicle for a long while, you'll also be getting dropped at another junkyard, though that one is going to be smaller as it's actually within another city. I don't what city it'll be, it depends on the vehicle you get on. The one I hitched on was green, specific to the Yurobian continent."

"Yurobian continent?" He asked.

"Mm." You nodded. "It's one of the bigger ones. You'll probably be homeless for a little bit. You might even be tempted to commit a crime. I don't suggest it, the last Meteor City citizen who got arrested ended up causing quite the commotion, a lot of people died." You tapped your chin, putting on a thoughtful expression. "Honestly, without the help of the mafia, trying to make a life for yourself in the outside world will prove to be difficult."

Violet slumped. It's clear he didn't like either of the options you had presented him.

"Well, if all else fails, you can still seek their help!" You beamed. "The Yurobian's main garbage sight, that's if you hitch a ride on one of the green trucks and head there, is actually quite close to York New City. Many members of the mafia are known to work there. They also won't doubt you if you say that you're from Meteor City, as only a handful of people actually know of that place."

"Isn't there anything better?" He asked. "You're smart, you should know something."

"You think I'm smart?" You perked up.

"You were able to find this place," he pointed out.

"True, true," you said. "I admit, I do know a handful of other ways to secure a good life."

"Then why aren't you telling me them?" He glared at you.

"Honestly? I was hoping to fuck you over."

"Bitch."

"Oh!" You laughed. "Where'd you learn that one?"

He didn't respond.

"When you get out of the main garbage sight, go into the city, go into a restaurant– you'll know that it's a restaurant when you see a bunch of people eating in one room," you spoke, "and put on a show."

"A show?" He blinked, confused.

"Yeah, act your ass off," you said. "Walk up to one of the people serving the food and tell them you don't know where you are and most importantly: who you are. I suggest doing it in a restaurant because if you just walk up to some random stranger and they end up being a creep they're going to take advantage of the situation and kidnap you or something. In a restaurant you'll have more witnesses, more eyes, and more people who will want to make sure that you end up okay."

"And then what?" He asked.

"Well, you'll probably end up being taken to a hospital," you revealed. "I mean, taking in your appearance and the lies you'll be telling, they're going to want to make sure you're physically okay first and foremost. They'll run tests and asks you questions, and throughout all of this you'll have make sure to keep your story solid."

"Okay." He nodded.

"Since they won't be able to identify you on any database, and you'll seemingly not be able to do so as well, they'll fix you up and send you to an orphanage," you revealed. "It's a place where adults stop by and see if they want to make you apart of their family. Since you're young, I assume you'll get adopted in no time." You concluded, "That's it. That's all you'll have to do to have a good life."

"You. . ." he started. "How do you know all of this?"

"Hm?" You tilted your head.

"How did you find this city? How do you know about the people here? About the mafia?" He paused. "How do you. . .no. . .why do you-?"

"It's just as you said," you spoke, tapping the side of your head, "I'm smart."

He sweat-dropped. "Isn't that rather conceited?"

"No, I'm giving credit where credit is due," you defended. "I'm smart, not omniscient. I was able to gather most of this information myself and some of it I just had to learn through experience. For example, I didn't actually think that hitching a ride on a garbage truck would take me to this city but—" you motioned around you —"here I am. I'm only assuming it can also hitch me, hitch you, a ride out of here as well."

"I see. . ." he muttered.

"As for the why. . ." you spoke up. "Well, it has to do with what I need your help on."

"And what is that?" He asked. "Why did you come here?"

"I want to meet someone."

"Who?"

You smiled.

"Have you heard of the Phantom Troupe?"

Instantly, the boy reacted. His body tensed, his eyes widened, and although it was dark you could still see the immense fear that spread across his face. A fear greater than the one's you had previously instilled in him through manipulative words.

Your smile widened, turning into a grin that bared teeth.

"I'm taking that as a yes," you spoke, a snicker escaping your lips soon after.

"The troupe? You- I-" He stuttered, voice shaky. "Why- I- No-"

"No, what?" Your eyes narrowed on Violet.

His breath hitched.

"No, you can't keep your side of the deal up anymore?" You asked. Despite your words, despite the fact that you were talking about not getting your way, your grin widened with glee. It was clear you were okay with him trying to back down just as much as you were with him not doing so. "If that's the case. . .then I'm going to torture you."

"Wha-?" His eyes widened even further. "I-"

Silence.

"How did you move so quickly?"

You giggled.

Within the blink of eye, before Violet could process it had even occurred, you had stood up and made your way over to him. You leered down at the boy, you hair creating a blanket over you two that did nothing but darken your surroundings. That said, you could see each other perfectly. He could see the narrowed, and joyful, e/c eyes that stared down at him as well as the wide grin that accompanied it. You could still see the terrified expression he was adorning, towards the Phantom Troupe and now you as well.

"How'd I move so quickly~?" You mused. "Who knows? Hehehe! Maybe I'm just like Gon and Killua, maybe I'm also like those one in a million who have the potential for greatness. Or maybe it just has to do with that." Your voice lowered to a whisper. "It's unfortunate that I also fall into another category. The category of a selfish human being. Just, like, the, phantom, troupe~"

"Wh- what?" The boy tried to back away but you only neared closer, still with that same unsettling expression on your face.

Your companions were silent all throughout this.

"I'm just like Phantom Troupe~" You mused. "That's why I want to meet them! They hold the knowledge to something. . .I really, really, need. So I'm trying to meet one of the members, so I can take that knowledge for myself and put it to use." You giggled. "It probably makes no sense to you, does it? That's okay~ I'm not expecting any of the words that leave my lips to make any sense, not to anyone that isn't me anyway, or anyone who also hasn't been blessed like me."

You suddenly straightened up, startling the boy.

"But that's all besides the point. What I need from you is to tell me where you've spotted the members of the troupe, and I know you have if your terrified expression is anything to go off of, as well as any other information that could help me find them. I'll also need you to act as my guide for bit, telling me where to go and where to avoid." You tilted your head, eyes narrowing on Violet as you did so. "I need to find the troupe no matter what, so if you try to back down now, I'll torture any and all information you hold of them right here. . .right now."

"That- that'd be too much trouble," the boy tried convincing.

"Not for me!" You beamed. "I've recently found that hurting other people is just as fun as being hurt! I wouldn't mind having to torture you whatsoever! So, help me or not, I'll end up having a good time."

"You're crazy," he insulted.

"And you're going to lose your fingers."

For a minute all Violet did was stare at you. His eyes bore into your own, trying and failing to read your thought process. You didn't give him any hints with the you simply smiled. Eventually, he gave up and sighed.

"Fine," he said, "I'll help."

"Great!" You clapped your hands. "It's settled then!"

"I'll take you someplace tomorrow morning," he stated. "I haven't met the troupe myself, and I don't know where they operate, but I have seen them around this specific building every once in a while."

"That'll do nicely~"

"Okay, good, whatever," he said with a huff. "Let's go to sleep now."

"Alright!"

With that said, you made yourself comfortable on the previous spot you had been sitting on, across from Violet. The boy was quick to fall asleep, his light snores meeting your ears after only a few minutes of saying your goodnight's. You, on the other hand, simply sat there staring into the fire. That same smile was still plastered on your face.

[You're a psychopath.]

"And you finally decided to speak up," you noted.

(Y/n. . .)

"Yes~?"

(You. . .)

"Hm?"

(You're scary!!! ≡≡≡=(ﾉTдT)ﾉ )

You laughed.

(Why did you threaten him? I mean, I know why, but- but- but he's just a kid! Don't you feel bad?)

"No," you bluntly stated.

( ´△｀)

[lol]

(You started rambling there about Gon and Killua. . .and even hinted at the existence of nen. Y/n. . .I don't mean to sound rude, I really don't, but. . .you seemed kind of out of it? To let that slip. . .)

[What feather's is failing to say is that you looked and sounded fucking insane. That brat doesn't know who Gon and Killua are, he isn't ever meant to, but you just blurted it out. Was that on purpose or did you just get so lost in your little crazy brain to realize you aren't supposed to be talking about them?]

"I suppose I did get a bit too excited there because I can't remember doing any of that!" You laughed.

[This bitch-]

(Y/n. . .please be more careful about what you say. You might accidently slip out the fact that you were reincarnated!)

"Hm. . .I'll try~"

(Thank you. Now, try going to bed! You need rest if you're going to be travelling around Meteor City tomorrow!)

Despite the angel's words, you didn't end up getting any sleep at all. This was nothing new, having learned at a young age to stay up lest your mother caught you off guard and murdered you in your sleep. As the years passed by, said survival technique had turned into a habit. Now, it was physically impossible to get any rest. You had programmed yourself to be an insomniac. Underneath your eyes were painted circles and you had a feeling said paint was permanent, that no matter how many more years would now pass without your mother, you would never be able to fall asleep with ease.

Throughout the time you had meant to be asleep you instead spent staring into the fire with a smile on your face. When that died down, you closed your eyes, resting them until you felt the warmth of the sun shining down on your lids.

You sat up.

(Good morning!)

"Good morning."

[Shut up, you're hurting our head.]

You placed a hand on your head, your skin creating goosebumps at the contact. Throughout the recent days, you had come to find that your two companions felt anything and everything that had to do with your head. They figured that's were they came to reside after losing their physical forms. Because of this, all the migraines you gained from lack of sleep affected them as well. But because you had long gotten accustomed to said pain, as well coming to take pleasure in it, it didn't bother them as much as it normally would.

"You're awake."

Your eyes shot over to Violet.

He was sat up, rubbing his eyes and yawning. Once he was done, his eyes met yours, narrowing in suspicion.

"You didn't sleep did you?"

"Nope!" You beamed.

He sweat-dropped.

"Why are you so cheerful about that?"

"Do you want to eat?" You asked, changing the subject. You reached for your bag, opening it and taking out two cans, one of which you tossed over to Violet. "Here."

"Is this fruit again?' The boy asked, turning the can over in his hand.

You nodded as you pried the can open.

The both of you ate your breakfast quickly, not wanting to waste any time on getting your side of the deal completed. Once you were done, the both of you were off to the location Violet had spoken of the night before.

"It's like a row of broken down building," the boy tried describing to you. "One of them is super big, with colorful glass and a bunch of crosses."

"Oh?" You tilted your head. "A church?"

You couldn't help but be amusemed at the idea of the Phantom Troupe hanging around a church. It was probably due to Chrollo, you figured, seeing as he was often related to religion. You couldn't help but wonder if he held any such beliefs himself, and most of all, you couldn't help but wonder how he'd react upon finding out that the people whom the church was dedicated to were not in fact present.

"Who have you spotted at the church?" You asked.

"Um—" Violet stuttered, stepping around a pile of garbage —"I think I've seen all of them."

"Really?" Your eyes widened in surprise.

"Well, it's usually just one member at a time but," he paused, as if remembering something, "there was this one time where I saw all of them together. I think they had just come back from somewhere. They were carrying a bunch of stuff with them."

"Oh~?" You grinned.

You couldn't help but wonder if any of the items they had stolen were hidden within the church. Not that you'd attempt to steal anything.

"It's just a bit further," Violet spoke up, pointing in the distance. "Just on the other side of that trash."

A hand above your eyes, you looked into the distance to see where he was pointing to: a mountain of debris. Stacks upon stacks of trash, rotten food, and cement blocks reached high up. Nonetheless, you could still make out the tops of the buildings Violet had spoken about.

"The trash get's thick here, so we'll need to do some climbing," Violet revealed. "Be careful where you step or you'll end up falling."

Just as he had warned, you found yourself climbing alongside the boy with utter caution. Trash would slip out easily from underneath almost causing you a handful of injuries. Normally, you wouldn't mind, but being so close to the rumored church excited you even more so than the idea of getting hurt as it meant meeting a member of the troupe. As you carefully made your way over the mountains of trash, you found your heart beating harshly and your face hurting with the wide smile you had on display.

_Just a bit more-_

(Be careful!)

[!!!]

"Y/N!"

You yelped, your foot slipping underneath you. Having taken your eyes off from in front of you, you completely missed the lack of trash before you, causing you fall forward. Thankfully, lady luck was on your side once more, as there was a piece of cement with a smooth surface just underneath, creating a perfect slide.

The moment your neared the bottom, you planted your feet on the ground, standing up.

You couldn't help but gawk at the sight before you.

[That's. . .not a church.]

(Why is it. . .so. . .big?)

[Ha, that's what she said.]

You didn't even have it in you to laugh at the demon's joke, or pay attention to the boy who was yelling down at you, too shocked by the sight that graced you.

Demon was right, the rumored building that Violet had spoken about was in fact not a church, it was a cathedral.

Many didn't know the difference between a church and cathedral, you hadn't either until your previous father took you to the latter in hopes of taking some photos that would put you in good graces with the public, because in truth there weren't many differences. They were both places of worship. However, the way to identify a church from a cathedral is how fucking gigantic the latter is in comparison to the former.

"Oh, so when Violet said super big, he meant super big."

[Why is a cathedral smack dab in the middle of Meteor City? Ain't this place supposed to be a trash sight?]

(It's probably from before it was turned into a junkyard.)

The building in question, despite looking as if it had gone through a war, still held the pride from when it was created. It was like a castle, standing so tall you had to crane your neck all the the way up to be able to properly take it in. The architecture was so beautifully complicated you didn't think even the most skilled of writers could begin to describe it: large glass windows, statues, crosses, and carved in details, they all came together to form a grand picture. Unfortunately, a lot of that picture was being blocked off by other buildings, buildings which were almost identical to one another, making you question if Kortopi's nen ability was being used to try and block/hide certain sections of the cathedral. Nonetheless, it was still a grand sight to behold.

"Isn't it funny?" You asked out loud. "Such a beautiful building was made for a God that isn't listening. I wonder how everyone who helped lend a hand in making it felt upon dying and finding out that they dedicated a large amount of their time to someone who could hardly care."

(. . .)

[. . .]

"What are you rambling about?"

You glanced down beside you, eyes coming to meet a pair of violet one's.

"Are you talking to the voices in your head again?" Violet asked. "Weirdo."

You couldn't help but laugh at that.

"So," you started, turning back to the building before you, "this is where you saw the Phantom troupe?

"Yeah," the boy confirmed. "If you can't find any of the members here then try talking to one of the assembly members, since they watch over the city they might know where the troupe is."

"That's a good idea," you muttered. "Where can I find them?"

"Just keep heading north," the boy spoke, "their building is even bigger than this."

"Oh?"

Silence.

It only lasted a minute.

"So is this goodbye?" Violet asked.

"i suppose it is."

"Alright," the boy said, turning around. "See you never crazy bitch. Thanks for the food, and name, and. . .information, I guess."

You laughed, bringing a hand up to ruffle his hair. At the contact, the boy blushed and moved away.

"What're you-!?"

"Go have fun," you said. "Once you leave this place, just go have fun. Trust me when I say that you won't suffer any consequences for indulging yourself."

"Is that why you're like this?" He asked.

"Hm?" You rose a brow.

"Is that why you're so. . .weird?" Violet asked. "Because you don't think you're going to suffer the consequences of your actions?"

"I know I won't suffer any consequences," you said with a grin. "You won't understand, not until later in life, but by then it'll be too late. So just do as I say and go have fun."

"At the cost of turning out like you?" He scoffed. "No thanks."

You couldn't help but laugh at that.

"Well, see ya," the boy said, turning to walk away.

"Goodbye, Violet."

And with that, your deal with the boy was met and your time together was cut.

You turned around, once more coming to face the cathedral before you. A few minutes passed of you simply observing the building and the others surrounding it, in which you determined no one was around, before you finally made your way inside.

The moment you stepped into the cathedral you found yourself being overwhelmed by a whole new world. A world in which the only person who existed was you. It was empty, something you had expected, but the tall ceilings and wide walls made it feel much more so, it made the inside of the cathedral feel lonely, and you hyper aware of yourself.

There were pillars on either side of you, and between them peaked out windows in colorful shades and shapes, no doubt telling a story for whatever version of the bible this placed once preached. Across from you was another one of those windows, another piece to the story, with a giant glass of color depicting what you could only assume to be a priestess. She was sat on the floor adorning what appeared to be a cassock, an expression of awe on her face as she outstretched her hands, as if expectancing something to be given to her. Her appearance was odd, cassock aside, with long red hair cascading down her back and onto the floor around her like a waterfall of blood. Her eyes were also a bright purple, briefly reminding you of the boy you had just parted from. All in all, it was the most detailed and odd window you had ever seen.

And just a few feet away was her physical form.

Made from what you could only assume to be white marble, was a statue of the woman, in the exact pose she held on the window. The window which blanketed her in colorful rays of light, highlighting her features. You didn't think it was possible, but she was even more detailed than before, making you question if it was truly a statue that sat just a few feet away.

[Hey, what's that?]

"Hm?"

[That thing in her hands.]

(Oh, I see it!)

Stepping towards the statue, you came to see what your two companions were been talking about. A coin. Specifically, a golden coin. Upon taking it in your hands, you came to find that it held two sides: one of a spider and the other of a web.

"So Violet hadn't lied," you spoke out loud. "The Phantom Troupe does reside here."

Flipping the coin through your fingers, you glanced around at your surroundings. Most of the benches which people sat at during preaching were missing, except for a save few that were strewn about. They allowed a clear view of the floor, full of cracks which grass took the advantage to grow in. There were a few stains of blood here and there, the most prominent one being a trail that led past the columns and towards a far off room.

"I wonder if a dead body was dragged through there," you muttered, eyeing the trail.

"Move and you'll find out."

You smiled.

"Took you long enough."

Moving away from the trail of blood, your eyes landed themselves on the blade pressed against your neck. Reflecting on it was a familiar face, a face you recalled seeing through the pages of your manga, a face that once spoke out loud on the screen of your computer, a face that at one point in your previous life you had loved so dearly. It was the face of someone who used to be one of your favorite characters.

It was the face of Feitan Portor.

[Damn it, we got the most difficult one.]

(That's mean. . .)

[And true.]

Silently agreeing with the demon, you moved your head slightly to the side get a better glimpse of the man, ignoring how his blade pressed harder against your neck at the movement. He was much younger than you remembered, with the features of one in their late teens, around eighteen or so. His hair was shorter but still shaggy, his eyes as sharp as ever, and his frown was still in place. The only major difference you took note of him having in comparison to his older self was the lack of a scarf, exposing his lower face and neck.

[Yo, I think you're shorter than him.]

(She is twelve years old.)

"Who are you?" Fetain spoke up, snapping you out of your thoughts. You didn't fail to take note of the accent lacing his words. "Why did you come here?"

"I wanted to ask you for something," you said with a smile.

"The answer's no," he immediately responded. He removed his sword and shoved you away. "Fuck off."

[I'm surprised he hasn't kill you yet.]

(Well, people in Meteor City are nicer to each other than they are to the people outside. Maybe he thinks she's from here?)

"I haven't even asked you yet," you pointed out.

"I don't care." Feitan glared at you. "I said fuck off."

"I don't want to!" You beamed. "I came a long way to meet a member of the Phantom Troupe, turning back now would be making that all for nothing."

Feitan's eyes narrowed on you.

"You're not from here," he growled out.

"Nope!"

"Then I'm going to kill you."

In a split second, you once more found Feitan's blade pressing against your neck, except this time it actually drew blood. The moment you felt the cold metal pierce your skin you found a gasp leaving your lips, not in shock or fear, but in excitement. Excitement that fueled further upon catching sight of said blood trailing across the blade and falling onto the floor. Excitement that erupted a wide grin across your face. Excitement that, you failed notice, startled Feitan.

"You. . ."

"Hm~?" Your eyes trailed towards Feitan. "What's wrong~? Aren't you going to kill me~?"

He didn't respond, instead choosing to observe you with narrowed eyes.

"C'mon, kill me!" You encouraged, smile getting wider and wider with every word you spoke. "Slit my throat! Go ahead! Do it! Do it!"

"What the fuck is wrong with you?" He hissed.

"What?" You tilted your head. "You've never met someone who was okay with dying before?"

"Is that why you came here?" He asked. "So you can ask to be murdered?"

"No, but I obviously wouldn't mind it." You revealed, "I came because I know your troupe members come to this place often and I wanted to ask one of you for something."

"Which is?"

You smiled.

"Teach me nen!"

Silence. It clear by the expression on Feitan's face that he hadn't expected those words. 

"I want to get strong," you revealed. "I want to learn how fight, kill, and use nen. And I don't want to learn it from just anybody. I want to learn from one of the members of the phantom troupe, from you, because I know you're at the level I want to be at someday."

"Why?"

You smiled.

"Because being strong means being able to do whatever I want."

"And why should I help you get strong?"

"You don't have to," you said with shrug. "I can just go bother another one of your members. If I was able to find you then I'm sure I can fine the rest of them."

"How do you even know about nen?" He questioned.

"I was a victim of manipulation," you lied.

"No wonder you're half-awake."

Half-awake. To be in a state of half-awakening is to be able to control your aura to a certain degree and release larger amounts of it in comparison to a normal person, all the while still having some of your aura nodes closed, resulting in you being unable to actually see aura. Those who are half-awake are usually victims of nen manipulation, and because of this, fail to realize they're half-awake. It wasn't until just a few days ago that you were also in the unknown. 

Angel had worriedly brought up the fact that, besides gaining your memories and being forced to share your head-space with them and demon, some of your aura nodes had been forced opened. They were confused as to why a head injury suddenly caused all of these physical changes, fretting over the possible consequences, but you just brushed it off as another blessing. It was probably the added aura that had helped you easily murder your mother, instill fear into Violet, and now shock Feitan Portor.

"So you just want to be able to do as you please?" Feitan asked, snapping you to attention.

"Mhm!" You beamed. "I want do anything and everything, I want to get anything and everything, and most of all. . ."

You trailed off, smile slowly dropping from your face.

". . .I want to be able to kill anyone who dares to get in my way."

Feitan's eyes widened, surprised.

Your smile returned.

"Well?" You tilted your head. "Are you going to teach me nen or not? I'd appreciate it if you did~"

At first, Feitan didn't respond. Instead, he prompted to stare at you, his eyes observing every inch of your face. What he was looking for, you did not know, much less care for. Eventually, his eyes connected with yours once more, narrowing for a brief second before turning away.

He sheathed his sword, turned, and began to walk away.

"Let's go."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ha·mar·ti·a  
> noun  
> a fatal flaw leading to the downfall of a tragic hero or heroine


End file.
